I don't understand....

kinky · March 6th, 2008, 01:44 PM

last year, this girl I was really close with broke my heart in a very bad way. She told she didn't love me and never wanted to speak to me. Blocked every way of me contacting her. So forth. Took some time to get past some of it but it still hurt. Then I started to think about her again, because, well my birthday was approaching and her birthday is one day after mine.

In january, on facebook, she poked me, but I couldn't poke back. So I was like, meh. Then on my birthday, she sends me a message via facebook and tells me happy birthday and ends it with "<3"

I said thanx, and she said, "yw love"

Then she either blocked me or deactivated her FB account, but again, I can't get in contact with her.

Now I know that I still have feelings and all, but seriously... wtf? I don't understand any of it.

I'm perplexed right now

**Carnitas** · March 6th, 2008, 02:06 PM

The thing is, at least from what I have noticed over the years, is those messages were probably just innocent messages, and she didn't mean anything by calling you love or ending it with a heart. Girls will do things, and then the guy will most likely over analyze what is going on. I know I have done that multiple times, and sometimes still do. My friend used to call me "love" and back in my naive days, I would think, woah, I wonder what that means, when in fact, it meant absolutely nothing. If she's trying to block all contact with you, take it as that and just leave it alone. Look for some new girls to have fun with, or if you're old enough, go to the bars with your buddies and enjoy being single right now. Someone else will come along and when they do, you will be quite ready. Good luck.

huddie25 · March 6th, 2008, 03:30 PM

I agree with Carnitas. Do not over analyze the situation. All she was doing was making sure that you knew she was still alive. It doesn't matter if she moved on or not....she wants you to still think about her and want her. Don't give her that satisfaction. If she gets a hold of you again just ignor it. Move on...you'll be better off.

**justaguy87337** · March 6th, 2008, 04:17 PM

Head Games WHO need em.....she knows how much u like her and she wants to make sure you still know she is out there and untouchable by you. Forget her, there are plenty of women out there who will treat you much better.

**MissytroN** · March 6th, 2008, 05:33 PM

This girl sounds like she definately aint worth ur time. If shes doing stuff like this to you at the start of ur relationship, how much will she want to play with ur head later on. Find someone who will appreciate u, u deserve it! =)

**Chopper_Dave** · March 6th, 2008, 05:58 PM

Sounds Familiar..., Was Her Name Bridget?

**tooncesthecat** · March 6th, 2008, 06:12 PM

I agree that girls will use terms like "babe" and "cutie" much the same way guys use terms like "dude" and "bro". You can't really attach much more meaning. Also agree that she's, at best, a poor communicator or, at worst, a total bitch. She left you hanging initially, re-established contact, then dropped out again, all without any attempt at communicating her feelings or intentions to you. You're better off without her!

**theatrain** · March 6th, 2008, 06:26 PM

If she hurt you bad enough to break your heart I'm guessing it means you guys actually had a pretty serious relationship where you actually had some serious feelings for each other. Did you guys' ever get ... closure? like a final goodbye or anything.. like everything out there before it ended?

If you guys' were serious than I think those "happy birthday<3" and "yw love" messages are just reflections of her thinking back at the good times she had with you and then the things like blocking you or deleting her Facebook maybe she just realized "What the heck am I thinking.. theres a reason we broke up, it wasn't meant to be". Which isn't abnormal.. I mean if you guys' were together and serious of course once n' a while you're going to look back on the good ol' times, but where she went wrong was kind of leading you on to make you think something was still there with those messages. From your post, you sound like a loving person who doesn't just think about relationships like "Hell ya im about to bang dis chick yo" which is the attitude most assholes have.. and who knows, maybe shes dating an asshole now and misses out on having someone who actually love and respected her.

Anyway. There was a reason you guys' broke up and have stayed broken up for over 1 year and I think you should do the same thing she does.. cut off all communication and find a women who will love you unconditionally

**wildstang** · March 6th, 2008, 07:53 PM

thats why i like older more sofisticated women. grown up, and know exactly what they want usually...lol

**Chopper_Dave** · March 6th, 2008, 09:13 PM

kinky · March 6th, 2008, 10:30 PM

I always come here for advice and I understand y, thanx guys

**wildstang** · March 6th, 2008, 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kinky

I always come here for advice and I understand y, thanx guys

glad we can help out. dont dwindle on this dame, shes obviously not worth your time. i know the feeling part you have sucks but look at the big picture.....if it was ment to be you would be with her. there is another woman in your future, but you just havent met her yet. or maybe you have and dont realize it yet. but just take your time and everything will work out for the best!

**Carnitas** · March 7th, 2008, 02:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tooncesthecat

I agree that girls will use terms like "babe" and "cutie" much the same way guys use terms like "dude" and "bro". You can't really attach much more meaning. Also agree that she's, at best, a poor communicator or, at worst, a total bitch. She left you hanging initially, re-established contact, then dropped out again, all without any attempt at communicating her feelings or intentions to you. You're better off without her!

Honestly, I fell for that when I was younger. Quite honestly, it wasn't too long ago, maybe like 4 or 5 years. If a girl called me babe or cutie or sweetheart or something like that, my mind would go into "omg this girl likes me totally" mode. It was pretty pathetic. Hopefully kinky, you can learn from my mistakes as well as any others from the members here and use it to your advantage in the quest for the perfect woman.

**ItalianStallion** · March 7th, 2008, 03:39 AM

i think the analogy is bro n dude is how gurls talk to guys...if a gurl calls u babe or hun its usually simple type of affection...gurls do like to tease..their is this one gurl at work that likes to flirt wit me because she knos i will never do nething because i told her shes too young to even look at sum times...she gets flirty n makes comments n rubs up on me...now me bein the smart guy i kno that these r just flirty teases...god forbid i eva say he wanna go out or even let me walk u to ur car it'll be a red flag that im a creepo...SO in conclussion gurls suck...but we still go afta em!

**MissytroN** · March 7th, 2008, 06:12 AM

Y'know what, I totally agree, the words babe, cutie, etc etc are so overused, especially by chix. It's unfair to lead someone on like that...they are affectionate words! I personally stick to 'dude' =)

**tooncesthecat** · March 7th, 2008, 07:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MissytroN

Y'know what, I totally agree, the words babe, cutie, etc etc are so overused, especially by chix. It's unfair to lead someone on like that...they are affectionate words! I personally stick to 'dude' =)

Thanks "dudette"!

Dunga · March 8th, 2008, 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Carnitas

The thing is, at least from what I have noticed over the years, is those messages were probably just innocent messages, and she didn't mean anything by calling you love or ending it with a heart. Girls will do things, and then the guy will most likely over analyze what is going on. I know I have done that multiple times, and sometimes still do. My friend used to call me "love" and back in my naive days, I would think, woah, I wonder what that means, when in fact, it meant absolutely nothing. If she's trying to block all contact with you, take it as that and just leave it alone. Look for some new girls to have fun with, or if you're old enough, go to the bars with your buddies and enjoy being single right now. Someone else will come along and when they do, you will be quite ready. Good luck.

Horrible advice dude. Metaphorically speaking, no's the time to go peek-a-boo, cut off the ring (no pun intended), bang the body and square it up once and for all in ring center. Innocent or not it's stuff like this that drive guys to games.

**wildstang** · March 8th, 2008, 05:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dunga

Horrible advice dude. Metaphorically speaking, no's the time to go peek-a-boo, cut off the ring (no pun intended), bang the body and square it up once and for all in ring center. Innocent or not it's stuff like this that drive guys to games.

whoa.....lol.....this post here almost sounds like our previously beloved cons mind frame.

lol

**cujo-1** · March 8th, 2008, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dunga

Horrible advice dude. Metaphorically speaking, no's the time to go peek-a-boo, cut off the ring (no pun intended), bang the body and square it up once and for all in ring center. Innocent or not it's stuff like this that drive guys to games.

scary thought it does sound similar to him. maybe hes back!

**tooncesthecat** · March 8th, 2008, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dunga

Horrible advice dude. Metaphorically speaking, no's the time to go peek-a-boo, cut off the ring (no pun intended), bang the body and square it up once and for all in ring center. Innocent or not it's stuff like this that drive guys to games.

Dunga, you want to try to say that again in words that make sense this time. LOL!