Female decryption...

[Dominic220]

...for lack of a better phrase.

So, an ex messages me while I was out today - keep in mind we're still friends - and asks "be honest, do you want me as a friend with benefits?" When I asked why she asked, all she responded with was "curiosity".

Now, this particular ex also said that she did *NOT* want flings / more than just friends with friends, so how am I suppose to read that? She wants attention, but can't get it, so she falls back to me? Self confidence issues and wanting to be told she's still attractive? Better question... why are 21 year old women so hard to understand?

[tooncesthecat]

Originally Posted by Dominic220

Better question... why are 21 year old women so hard to understand?

Answer: Because all women are hard to understand.

Advice: Move on!

[ckn]

Originally Posted by Dominic220

...for lack of a better phrase.

So, an ex messages me while I was out today - keep in mind we're still friends - and asks "be honest, do you want me as a friend with benefits?" When I asked why she asked, all she responded with was "curiosity".

Now, this particular ex also said that she did *NOT* want flings / more than just friends with friends, so how am I suppose to read that? She wants attention, but can't get it, so she falls back to me? Self confidence issues and wanting to be told she's still attractive? Better question... why are 21 year old women so hard to understand?

If you ever start to understand women then it wouldn't matter anyway because you'd probably have become gay Heterosexual men just don't understand women, those who think they do are sadly delusional.

Today, she might want a comfort shag with no strings attached, tomorrow that comfort shag might be taken to mean she wants a lifelong commitment.

If you don't really care about the relationship, have the fling, if you do care about keeping her as a friend, keep it platonic. Beware though that it might be a "trap" that she's setting to see if you're only interested in her body...

Women... strange beasts...

[A1food4U]

Head games are no basis for any kind of relationship. I have heard of VERY few relationships that actually work when based on the booty call.

If its a hot piece of a**, and your not connected to anyone else, and your moral structure allows, then no harm no foul.

If your holding out hope of a substantial and meaningfull relationship with a woman, than move on, this isn't for you. My two cents.

[mooshue]

Originally Posted by Dominic220

...for lack of a better phrase.

So, an ex messages me while I was out today - keep in mind we're still friends - and asks "be honest, do you want me as a friend with benefits?" When I asked why she asked, all she responded with was "curiosity".

Now, this particular ex also said that she did *NOT* want flings / more than just friends with friends, so how am I suppose to read that? She wants attention, but can't get it, so she falls back to me? Self confidence issues and wanting to be told she's still attractive? Better question... why are 21 year old women so hard to understand?

If she is 21 she is still most likely too immature to move on. Then again, maybe she just wants laid and figures why not go with someone shes already had instead of new flings.

[helpmespock]

Today, she might want a comfort shag with no strings attached, tomorrow that comfort shag might be taken to mean she wants a lifelong commitment.

OHH LMAO!!!!

Right on CKN.....and one day you may find her bawling her eyes out for no apparent reason, immediately after one of the "benefits"....the next a suicide note saying she is carrying your child and has cancer (actually happened to a friend of mine, and no, neither case was true)

the next day your pet rabbit is boiling in a pot......

i'm genuinely frightened for ya.....

[sexy69]

The bottom line is that she can't seem to find anyone else to move on to so she keeps coming back to you....

My suggestion is drop her all together! The reason is when you decide to move on and find someone else she will get in the way and cause problems!

[ItalianStallion]

if u r interested in her on a friends wit benefits area than go for it...she is the one that brought it up so she intiated it, so it could lead to a relationship, but if u dont wanna take it that far make it certain that u arent interested in relationship n she'll let u kno if she still wants it...otherwise stay away...women r complicated, hopefully one day we men will understand

[JarheadRI]

Go bag her.... just make sure she doesen't have a second set of keys to your apartment.

[joey9]

Originally Posted by tooncesthecat

Answer: Because all women are hard to understand.

This reminds me of a great story...



A man was walking along a beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up, rubbed it and out popped a genie.

The genie said "In gratitude for releasing me from the lamp, I will grant you one wish."

The man said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii but I can't fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive there?"

The genie got upset and said, "Think of the logistics involved. The supports would have to reach the bottom of the ocean. Think of how much concrete, how much steel would be needed. What you're asking for would be next to impossible. Can't you think of anything else?"

The man was quiet for a while. Then he said softly, "I've always wanted to understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment. I want to understand why they're crying, know what they really want when they say 'nothing', and know how to make them truly happy."

The genie replied "Will that be two lanes or four?"

[Carnitas]

hit sir, hit it till you get bored

[lizzyb]

Female POV: Move on.....no good can come from this, lol!!

[Dominic220]

huzzah for female POV's when they're blunt, and you don't need a 1941 enigma machine to understand them!

[pliny_2001]

She's been out, had a bad/not great date or two, and wants to get laid. She doesn't like the guys she's met, so you're just a pressure relief valve. If you're fine with that, go for it. If you aren't, then don't.

(of course, there's always a chance that she's legitimately crazy. or secretly wants you back. but in my experience it's the first scenario)

[hardgainer]

If you hit it, you may get shot by the love arrow so if you do it you better be strong and not be afraid of it all turning on you and you end up being the one who gets hurt...

[torofuerte]

Originally Posted by mooshue

If she is 21 she is still most likely too immature to move on. Then again, maybe she just wants laid and figures why not go with someone shes already had instead of new flings.

^^^ Mooshue has teh corr3ct!!11

Women in general have a hard time getting intimate with a new person and prefer the comfort of being with someone they already know at that level (be it in a past relationship or fling.)

The problem for you, Dominic220, is whether she is actually completely detached from you... and whether you can have sex with her without re-attaching yourself to her emotionally.

When I say that she might not be completely detached from you, I don't mean to say that she might have feelings for you. This is another thing you see from some women.

They might not love you, but they love the fact that you will jump a fence for them at a minute notice with just a "come, bone me" call. They need attention, they seek attention, and poor the sap who confuse that with actual feelings.

Can you tap that ass and both of you walk away anytime either of you want in amicable terms, without the drama and the emotional involvement? If so, go for it.

If not, move on, find a new woman or use your hand or whatever. Don't get involved in messy emotional crap

Good luck.

[Dominic220]

Can you tap that ass and both of you walk away anytime either of you want in amicable terms, without the drama and the emotional involvement? If so, go for it.

--

heh, probably not. Even after pondering it over, in conjunction with this thread, I've made my decision. I have a feeling I know what it is/was, and why it was said. Thanks for all of your input.

[JimmymonFreddy]

Originally Posted by Dominic220

...for lack of a better phrase.

So, an ex messages me while I was out today - keep in mind we're still friends - and asks "be honest, do you want me as a friend with benefits?" When I asked why she asked, all she responded with was "curiosity".

Now, this particular ex also said that she did *NOT* want flings / more than just friends with friends, so how am I suppose to read that? She wants attention, but can't get it, so she falls back to me? Self confidence issues and wanting to be told she's still attractive? Better question... why are 21 year old women so hard to understand?

list of rules for men from women

1. When crying occurs you caused it and should fix it. Perfect time for a gift.

2. Watching Star Trek or any type of non-romance movie/ T.V. show should also be rewarded in a gift.

3. The toilet seat prefers to be down. Gravity; any questions?

4. When we ask if we are fat, we are looking for a "NO I love you just the way you are" answer.

5. Cindy Crawford cuts her hair why can't we?

6. We are not always thinking of you.

7. We are not always looking for the perfect gift... some gift is better than no gift, and we realize it is the thought that counts.

8. Our Cats truly are special friends.

9. Shopping is not a sport, it's an adventure.

10. We value your opinion on our outfits and perhaps you should ask for direction when you are dressing.

11. Wearing the same clothes because they are on top of the pile is not acceptable.

12. If we had enough clothes or shoes then why are there so many stores?

13. When we ask for something we want it then!! Don't wait for a birthday, etc. you may for get what it is that we want.

14. If you cant be expected to hit the toilet, we can't be expected to find the oil.

15. When the lights come on in the car, we let you know when we get around to it.

16. Three pairs of shoes in not a selection, its a crisis!

17. Boots, old tennis shoes, and grass shoes are not adequate shoe choices.

18. We don't believe you when you say you'll be right home.

19. Yes and No are not answers, you are not on trial and we are not your attorney.

20. We remember what you say regardless of how long its been. Why can't you?

21. Saying what you think we want to hear gets you in more trouble! Stop while you are ahead.

22. There are no good sports.

23. Why can't you ask for directions?

24. Why can't you follow directions?

25. How can we be expected to tell you about our day in just 30 seconds when it took all day to happen?

26. You too can order Pizza.

27. Chinese Food is a meal.

28. Chips and Dip are NOT a meal.

29. Why don't you know all of these rules?

I think it's in there somewhere




or here

female rules

1. The female always makes the rules
2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
3. No male can possibly know all the rules.
4. If the female suspects the MALE know all the rules, she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
5. The female is never wrong.
6. If the female is wrong, it is due to a misunderstanding which was a result of something the male did or said wrong.
7. The male must apologize immediately for causing said misunderstanding.
8. The female may change her mind at any time.
9. The male must never change his mind without the express written consent of the female.
10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The male must remain calm at all times unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The female must, under no circumstances, let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry and/or upset.
13. The male is expected to mind read at all times.
14. Any attempt to document the rules could result in bodily harm.
15. If the female has PMS, all the rules are null and void.
16. The female is ready when she is ready.
17. The male must be ready at all time.
18. The male who doesn't abide by the rules can't take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.

[lizzyb]

Originally Posted by JimmymonFreddy

list of rules for men from women





I think it's in there somewhere




or here

female rules

Lol!! I see we've met somewhere b4

[Gastankerdriver]

Originally Posted by Dominic220

...for lack of a better phrase.

So, an ex messages me while I was out today - keep in mind we're still friends - and asks "be honest, do you want me as a friend with benefits?" When I asked why she asked, all she responded with was "curiosity".

Now, this particular ex also said that she did *NOT* want flings / more than just friends with friends, so how am I suppose to read that? She wants attention, but can't get it, so she falls back to me? Self confidence issues and wanting to be told she's still attractive? Better question... why are 21 year old women so hard to understand?

Some strange advice on this forum. Who cares what she wants? To be honest, women often don't know what they want. What matters is what YOU WANT. She's probably testing you. If you don't know what you want, then you're probably not going to get it. If it was me, I would play it for as much as I could get. If she's on some kind of head trip, then just ignore her.